Your childhood: Then and Now

We are a product of our environment and the foundation of our childhood. 

Some people grow up with two parents and live in outwardly appearing world of rainbows and sunshine. Others are lucky if they have one parent and it seems as if the environment they are in gives them no hope.

Finally, many of us grow up in between these two scenarios.  A home with two hardworking parents doing the best they can to provide a loving and supportive situation. 

Oftentimes unknowingly,  this environment creates issues unbeknownst to anyone at the time. Maybe theres violence,  physical, mental, or emotional that gets ignored or noted as part of life.

Most of the time, the adults are doing the best they can and are simply a product of their upbringing.  

Regarding of the reason, that early childhood foundation sets the tone for adulting and parenting for the youth that turns into an adult.

To change the thread of culture, its important to be cognizant of what positive and not-so positive experiences that occurred. It's also needed to have a plan of what you hope to provide and to be aware of what went well and what may need to be adapted to produce a different result. 

Theres no guidebook to what will work and what will not. At the end of the day, each situation typically has at least one parent doing their best.

If the mold was less than desirable for you and that is not what you want for your own children,  it's key to set the tone and aim for a desired result.

A bullseye shot may not always be obtained but the results will be in the realm of what is hoped for with the proper attention and effort.

In the end, dont sulk, blame others or feel that things are out of your control. Be grateful for your happiness and experiences. Know that your parents did the best they could with the resources they had and know you can control the same outcome by focusing on the process to achieve alterations in the outcome when you are in the adult role of a parental relationship. 

Stay cool

It's hot outside and the heat isnt anything to play with. Many of us grew up as kids spending time outdoors and not even knowing what the temperature was.

Most of us were fine, we might have got tired, got sunburn or wore out but it wasn't a big deal. Oblivious to the notion of hydration,  we stayed that way drinking gallons of water.

Those days arent typical anymore so awareness is key. The heat is part of life so we, especially the young and the elderly, have to make sure we are prepared to keep our bodies healthy in these conditions. 

Think about others and help them be prepared and know the simple rules of self preservation to avoid having an untimely illness or trip to the hospital that could have been avoided.

Enjoy the summer days with friends, family, or however you see fit!

Be controlled or be in control

Breaking streaks isn't easy.  It takes work, it takes effort, it takes doing something different than the norm.

I think many of us get used to certain things and we let that control us. Our moods, emotions, and actions are dictated because we allow what we have gotten used to accepting to take us over.

Whether it's an addiction, your diet and exercise, regime, your sleep pattern or your desire to steer the wheel with your family or push the accelerator on your career, the only way we can do something different is to be in control.

Many of us want,  say we will, or are envious of others but most of us won't do anything different to achieve those longing desires.

It's not easy, nothing worth wanting is. But I believe we have to have faith first,  a direction of what you want to happen and a good support group.

Things won't always happen as we expect them but keeping that faith, that desire to meet your goal and having others to help pick you up when you fall makes the struggle a little easier.

At the end of the day, no matter if your trying to win the World Series for the first time in a century, overcome an alcohol or drug addiction, break out of a lifestyle pattern that you became used to from generations before you or anything else that you are confronted with, you have to make an effort.

Step by step, day by day. Have faith, be prepared,  and know there will be failure. Learn from that failure and stay in control.

Has the concept of hard work changed or have I?

As I've gotten older, I've started seeing things in a different shade of light then I use to. When I was growing up, there were no handouts, there was no backtalk, and if you wanted something you put in the effort to work for it.

I really don't think that much as changed in that aspect. If you want a car, you work so you can buy it or finance it and make the payments until it's yours. If you want a house, you do the same thing. If you want to lose weight, you exercise and diet in order to get results. If you want a promotion or a raise, you work hard, you go the extra mile, and you do things that may not necessarily be asked from you.

The difference is that there seems to be less people now that have that mindset. That is, to be willing to put in the efforts to accomplish those things. I'm not sure but maybe I was oblivious to things in my earlier years and missed how this mindset shift happened.

It may be that I'm older and the shift is just in my head, maybe it's always been that way. However, I don't truly believe that to be the case because there are many others that have said the same thing. The thing that doesn't really support me is that those folks tend to be in my age group or older.

Regardless, it doesn't matter what I think about others and I don't go out and blast people or make loud statements to be heard. I control myself and my actions and try to influence those around me with that mentality. The ones that I want to influence the most are my children. I raise them with those beliefs and feel like as they develop into there own individuality, this thought process will take them far with whatever it is they want to accomplish.

Of course, I feel like I should express these feelings to my co-workers in the professional field as they embark on their journey and they enter the professional world. I hope that my actions reinforce the words I say and that maybe it will be viewed as a positive attribute for others to desire.

At the end of the day, you have to be hungry, find what drives you and be willing to do what it takes to accomplish your goals, no matter what they are. It could be personal, professional, political, religious, or anything that you find to be important to you. No one else controls your destiny but you. Learn from your mistakes, stay positive, and do the right thing and success will be right in front of you.

Whether it's my perception that has changed or the beliefs of others around me that has changed over the years, my mentality will never shift in thinking that if you want something, you have to be willing to work for it.

Life is short

Life is short.  Nothing is guaranteed. It's said often but do you put meaning into the phrase?

There are different stages of life and maturity.  During those different stages,  a person can interpret these simple words In multiple ways. 

At any point, the reality is that nothing in life is certain and even the duration of one's life is unknown to anyone except the almighty.  We all make decisions that may not necessarily be the best at the time but if we learn from those decisions, that is a sign of growth and/or maturity.

I don't believe it's possible to avoid all of the uncertainties that may appear in life but you can prepare when you must face certain situations.

Planning and preparing is a key to success,  in my opinion,  and you're never too young to start.

Don't live without a plan or without goals. There is no such thing as "Can't". Don't become a victim or succumb to others negative thoughts.

If there's something you don't know,  ask. If you don't get the answer you're looking for,  keep pushing,  keep persevering.  Never, ever, give up!!

LIFE IS SHORT.  NOTHING IS GUARANTEED.

What changes, if anything, after the Marcus Smart situation?

At this point it becomes the word of one versus the word of the other.

A three game suspension for the Oklahoma State star is supposed to teach him a lesson about his conduct despite the outside influences. The biggest question that has been raised is about what are or aren't fans allowed to do when residing at major events. While I can only take Jeff Orr at face value, did Smart really become enraged because he called him a piece of crap? Or was something else muttered?

That has been the speculation since the occurrence on Saturday night. Fans of every sport on every level have something to say about someone. Not all fans are negative but there is at least one or a group at sporting events that feel the need to be negative to their opponents, the officials, and at times even their own.

The question that just popped into my head was this: Would having a barrier between the hardwood and fans help to prevent or eliminate similar events from taking place in the future?

If put in place, the landscape of the basketball experience would be changed because the barriers or walls would have to be built a certain distance from the court to prevent potential injuries. That would eliminate the popular court side seating that has been apart of the game for as long as I remember. These days, that also likely equates to a loss of money for events at the collegiate and pro levels so the proposition would likely be met with opposition.

Take into consideration, however, that of the four major US sports, basketball is the only one with no physical divider between fans and the playing area. Yes, there have been instances where fans jumped walls to get on the field but to my knowledge, the biggest indiscretion that came from such an instance was streaking.

At times, players have entered the stands inadvertently when a fielder in baseball is attempting to make a play and ending up in the stands or intentionally during a celebration such as the popular "Lambeau Leap". How often, though, has a physical situation between a player and a fan evolved in these other sports? Going on my knowledge alone, I would say that it has been very rare.

It's simply a thought. Regardless, athletes are always held to a higher standard and are expected to walk away from a situation such as this. In the heat of the moment with testosterone flowing, it has to be a difficult thing to do when a spectator, not another player, has the gall to say something they know will get under one's skin when they are essentially face to face.

As many have already stated, I concur and do not condone Smart's reaction but I don't think it's fair that Orr's actions or comments should have to be tolerated either.

I'm curious to what those who read this have to say about my thoughts or what your ideas/suggestions/comments are on this. Let me know. Reply to my post, tweet me @bigrob2523 or email me at bigrob2523@gmail.com

Where is UVA football?

I began this season with high hopes. I heard all the voices talking about how bad we were going to be but I didn't listen. I didn't pick the Cavaliers as ACC champions but I did expect the team to be above .500. I certainly never envisioned the team going 2-10 and finishing the year on a nine game losing skid.

As a season ticket holder, I was in attendance for the BYU opener. I saw the fight and the determination and despite the lack of offense, I remained positive. After all it was the first game of the season and don't they say that the defense is usually ahead of the offense when the season begins?

The next week against Oregon, I was one of the few that said we could be competitive. The team was, in my opinion, for a good half of football before the Ducks began to show what all the fuss was about. Although the team lost, I could say well it was Oregon and remain positive because the signs of potential were still there.

The blanking of VMI was nice but despite the large victory, I remained even keeled because it was a lower level school and Virginia didn't exactly burst from the gates. At 2-1, the real test, I thought, would be in the ACC opener at Pitt. Again, the defense played well but where was the offense. Some concern began to creep into my mind but, I thought, we're still 2-2 and there is plenty of season ahead.

When the team returned home and Ball State came to town, I believed it was our chance. I heard the voices that said don't overlook the Cardinals, they are a good team. I too, recognized that and went to the game with a calming positiveness. The effort in that game began to set the tone for the rest of the season. Our team was in the game but the fight went away as the opponent began to find success.

When we went to Maryland, I said if the Cavaliers can just get some offense going, we are going to be alright. The game against the Terrapins would be the last close game that fans would see in 2013 from UVA. A last second field goal sailed wide and with it went something that I have yet to pinpoint.

In the game against Duke, I was excited. I thought the team had found some mojo as they built an early first half lead. I can't remember the play but I recall the moment as we approached halftime where I felt like the momentum was beginning to shift. I remember saying that I hoped the team went into the locker room and responded well after the break.

I sat in disbelief through the remainder of that game and the two weeks to follow against Georgia Tech and Clemson as I wondered what is going on with this team? Yes, it is a relatively young squad. Yes, there was huge turnover on the coaching staff and it takes time to gel. But this team is filled with talent. Where is the fire?

I watched on TV the next two road losses and I ashamed to say that I didn't even attend the rivalry game against Virginia Tech. In all my years as a fan of the Cavs, I have always looked forward to the Tech game. I have not had the opportunity to be in attendance during a win against the disliked in-state squad but I have had fun at the games and always took the approach that this is our year.

This was not our year in so many ways. Still, the questions remain and I have tried to take a rest from trying to find answers to questions that others are getting paid big bucks to look for. Despite all the negativism, I have not jumped on the "Fire London" bandwagon. I believe he has it in him but the absence of fire, for lack of a better term, has me concerned.

We are going into the fifth year under his leadership? I certainly did not anticipate the team to be at this level at this point. We have a roster that has a ton of talent, an experienced and proven coaching staff, and a great potential recruiting class coming in. I, like so many others, can't keep believing in there is always next year.

If I had the answers, I wouldn't be sitting in this chair typing this. I don't but what I know is that something has to give in order for us to see the positive results that we desire and the hard working players deserve.

I will never jump off the UVA faithful bus but there are so many questions, that I for one, don't have the answer for. Maybe the most general one of all is in regards to the state of the team. Where is UVA football?